Dealing with Rejection

There is, probably not a one of us, who sometime in our lives has not experienced the pain of rejection. Some have experienced it more than others. I would like to talk about dealing with the pain of rejection. I pray that this might encourage someone today.

Coming to Him as a living stone, rejected indeed by men, but chosen by God and precious, 1 Peter 2:4.

In some sense we came into this world in a state of rejection. We were born in sin, dead in transgressions and sins. But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved). Ephesians 2:4,5. We were lost and hopeless, But God. Don't you love that phrase? If you have been born again I can tell you that you have experienced the pain of rejection. Some of it, we may have brought on ourselves; some of it we may not understand. If we do not get beyond that pain it will keep us from finding our place in the body. Let's look at some of the pitfalls.

1. When a person experiences rejection it causes them to turn inward. They are constantly looking at themselves. Their unmet needs become the object of focus and their neediness will eventually add to their rejection by driving others away.

2. A fear of rejection often develops and keeps the person from establishing meaningful relationships. They
are afraid that if they get close to someone, they'll only be hurt again so they keep everyone at arm's length.

3. Oftentimes there will be development of a stronghold that is like a threefold cord: shame, fear, and control.
Shame says," I am flawed". Fear says, "I am afraid you'll find out I'm flawed." Control says, "I will control everything around me so that you don't find out I'm flawed." It creates a wall which keeps us from getting free.

4. Rejection often flows out of self-rejection or even self-hatred. If I am to love others as I love myself, how can I receive others if I can't receive myself. A person with self-rejection will have difficulty loving others.

5. Rejection can be a state of unbelief. The person does not believe what God says about them.

So how do I get free? Sometimes the wounding was so severe that the enemy was given place and there is deliverance needed, but regardless I like to use the three r's:
1. Recognize- You must first recognize you have a problem. You must forgive those who hurt you.
2. Renounce- If I am living in rejection I have bought into the lies of the enemy. I must renounce those lies and break all agreement with those lies.
3. Replace- I must replace the lies with the truth.

So what is the truth?

To the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He has made us accepted in the beloved. Eph. 1:6. You have been accepted in the beloved. Please read verses 3-6 in Ephesians 1.

For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, "Abba, Father." Romans 8:15 In the process of adoption the parent chooses the child he is to adopt. You were chosen.

You did not choose me, but I chose you.... John 15:16a

No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent me draws him; and I will raise him up at the last day. John 6:44 The Father has drawn you to Himself with chords of love.

Coming to Him as a living stone, rejected indeed by men, but chosen by God and precious, you also, as living stones are being built up a spiritual house, a holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. 1 Peter 1:4,5 You are a part of that house. It is incomplete without you.

Just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world... Ephesians 1:4 God looked through the portals of time and saw you, His beloved.

You have been chosen. You may suffer rejection in this life, but the lover of your soul will never leave you nor forsake you. His plans for you are good. Man may hurt you, but our Father is faithful and He is there for us, if all else forsake us.

I hope this was an encouragement to you. I made a typo on the blog address last week. The correct address is: http://basiliea.blogspot.com/ If I can help you any way, don't hesitate to contact me. If these writings are an encouragement to you, I'd love to hear from you. That encourages me. May god bless you exceedingly.
In His love,
Herb Dean